My crew and I were addressing old age and progression, and the problems that are faced by today’s adolescents, when the charge nurse made a decision on an admission, an older lady tried to cut her wrists, and they brought in for her transgressions,
they said, approach her with discretion, she’s schizophrenic and aggressive, tried to take her life repeatedly and didn’t learn her lesson…..
I was told she was mine, and in the back of my mind, I strongly felt the urge to adamantly decline,
because her reputation preceded her, in layman’s she was called nutso, crazy, long gone, worse,
she’d once tried to strangle a man after reciting a bible verse, her clothes were tainted and tattered, she traveled around in a hearse, they even had the gall to say this woman had been cursed, could be folklore but that brought no comfort to this nurse, as I gathered my supplies so I could get her done first……
She was in the room at the end of the hall, seemed so far but yet, so close, the door to the room dark and eerie, more so than before, I found that my anxiety was provoked, taking slow strides as I closed in on my patient, three knocks at the door, as I entered and introduced myself with name and occupation,
There laid the cutest little old lady, almost made me dismiss the rumor mill, calm and collective, laying so still, appearance was that of a grandmother appeal, at first I was on edge but now my mood was on chill,
I conducted my admission appropriately, she mumbled responses appropriately, but one question she would not answer, no matter the amount of cueing and coaxing,
I repeated the question firmly:
“Are you experiencing any auditory or visual hallucinations???? Matilda??”
The question echoed the room strangely, as her distinguishing features began changing, and she appeared to be two people in one, one smiling, and one angry.
Her face began to take on the appearance of a postmortem man….. she even appeared to be larger in size, muscular even, it was difficult to understand.
Her eyes rolled, she spoke in a deep groan, and said “We. Are. Not. Aloneeee!”
With my vulnerabilities exposed I turned to find the dark door closed, afraid and unable to make a sound, found myself paralyzed from the neck down. “Thee spirits want me to take my life, thee spirits want me to take my life,” she yelled it out loudly not once but twice,
Her body jerked upright, as she crawled ape-like to the edge of the bed, and we stood there eye to eye,
In a deep, manly, demonic voice she spoke: “The is no Mrs Smyth here, were on the cusp of a greater event that is happening here, I know all about your indiscretions, secrets, and shortcomings, I know your desires and when your end is near.”
From my right eye dropped a single tear, as a moment of clarity brought about my deepest fears.
I realized that this room had no walls, numerous blue flames burning eternally in the distance, I struggled to breathe as my oxygen dissolved, she growled and whispered “listennnnn.”
“Were you not aware of the consequences of your decisions, judgmental opinions, subliminal interpersonal bullying, lack of prudent choices, congregating with my minion, nonchalantly hurting others, oblivious to your own descension????”
Her voice grew loud, rough and full of tension as she yelled, “were you unaware of my wrath!!!! I Am The Only Judge Here!!!!
OBLIVION IS YOUR SENTENCE!!!”
I awoke abruptly in a stupor sitting in front of my computer, in this midday nightmare I found zero humor, my coworkers watched and stared as they thought trouble was amidst, what was the meaning of these images, I didn’t get the gist, the errors in my ways…… the demon had created a list, my thoughts were interrupted as the charge nurse announced an admission arriving by the name of Mrs. Smyth.